One Year Ago, Settling in

Once we knew we were staying in Dniprodzherzinsk to adopt, Yana wanted to find us other places to stay. I was happy and comfortable at the hotel, but it didn't have a kitchen, laundry facility, or English TV. She said she had an apartment for us to look at. She said it was a nice, safe place with 2 bedrooms, kitchen, laundry, cable TV for $75.00 a night. Being thrifty I really just wanted to stay in the hotel. It was cheaper and I didn't plan on doing much cooking anyway. Later Yana negotiated the price of the apartment to $50.00 a night so I agreed to see it. (Jon didn't care either way). I knew it would be easier for Yana to be able to stay with us when she was in town. The apartment was very nice. New furnishings, new "European" kitchen, etc. It was on the main street in town within a couple of miles to the orphanage, and it was owned by the orphanage doctor. It had two huge entry doors, one on top of the other, with an elaborate system of locks using giant skeleton keys. We were told to never open the door for anyone. This was supposed to be a prestigious apartment, was this type of security necessary??? Anyway, sure we'd stay there, it was nice.

We packed up our stuff at the hotel and went back to move into the apartment. The doctor, Luba and her husband were there to show us around. As it turned out this actually was THEIR apartment where they lived. It seemed a bit awkward displacing them, but the salaries are so low there it would be a huge sum of money for them and they would live with their son.

They were the nicest couple we met on the whole trip. Very genuinely kind and friendly. Luba was very short and stocky with red hair, a huge smile, very talkative, and had very nice fur coats. Nikoli was tall and thin, more reserved, quiet and gentle. Neither of them spoke or understood one word of English. Luba proceeded to show us around the apartment talking a hundred miles an hour in Russian, smiling and laughing. She would point to something and say very deliberately JA- O -N, or S-H-A-L-I in a French sounding voice. There was a clothes line in the main hallway, about 12 feet above the floor and there was a step ladder to use to get the clothes up there. The kitchen had an oven, but she didn't know how to light it. The washing machine was in the bathroom and drained directly into the bath tub (we saw this everywhere). There was a nice TV with a satellite dish. Well, maybe we would get by.

Yana arranged for Luba's son Vlad, to drive us to the orphanage each day. We would walk in the morning every day and Vlad would drive us in the afternoon as it would be dark (and cold!) Vlad was a nice guy but also spoke no English. He could only say Hello and Goodbye, but he was there without fail each day to drive us to and from the orphanage. We were never sure what he did for a living but he seemed to be available all the time and had more than one cell phone. There were some very expensive cars behind our apartment building, we don't know who these people were but we called them "mafia". Weren't sure if it was a good or bad thing to share a building with "mafia"!

One Year Ago, The First Meeting

At last, we were going to the orphanage to meet the little girl. The entire town was gray and dreary. The buildings in the old Soviet style and not well kept up. Most buildings were gray, streets and sidewalks gray, sky gray. The orphanage was an institutional green color. It was surrounded by iron gates and had typical old steel playground equipment in the yard. The building itself was quite nice, and undergoing some renovation. We went into an office where the orphanage director and orphanage doctor were waiting for us. Yana, Roman (our facilitators) as well as the gold tooth lady from the inspectors office were also there. They began telling us that she was born with a cleft lip and palate and she was left at the maternity hospital after birth. She was there for three months before being transferred to the orphanage where she had been ever since. They then went on the say she has severe delays in speech as well as psychological delays. They said she may never be able to talk. Were we still interested? Of course!! We didn't come all this way to be scared off!
Suddenly she was in the room with us. Roman was saying "look at her, she's cute!" It was obvious to us in a matter of seconds that she was the one. She was very adorable, dressed in a fancy dress and new shoes (we never saw these clothes again). She made her way around the room interacting with everyone. She was so inquisitive! She came up to me, looked me straight in the eye and wanted to sit in my lap. She liked my clothes and earrings. She wasn't the least bit intimidated by Jon either. She was eager to go sit with him. We were prepared for a tough decision, and it couldn't have been easier. Our prayers were definately answered. We had an overwhelming sense of relief and happiness (actually euphoria). Everyone was all smiles, even the gold toothed lady. They continued to read her entire medical history to us and I was only half listening as we were more interested in DeAnna. We were told we would get copies of all of it later and could have it translated. (In the end we never received any of it...so I had to rely on my memory which fortunately is good, especially with medical information).
We said of course we want her, so Yana began the proceedings.
First we had to find a place to stay. At this point we had been up for about 30 hours but we kind of wired. Yana knew of a hotel in town. It was above some stores and offices, next to a grocery store on the main street in town. It had an elevator and a nice and very attractive lady at the desk who spoke a few words of English. The rooms were huge with soaring ceilings, lots of wood wardrobe closets, refrigerator, TV and enormous claw foot tub in the bathroom. It had frilly pink bedding and pink curtains on the huge windows. I really liked it and felt safe and comfortable there. It was $55 a night and I would have been happy to stay there the whole time. We got settled in and then went back to the orphanage for another short visit. This time we took pictures and played with her some more. They had to observe us with her all the time for the first weekend we were there.
Finally it was time for some food and celebration. We went to a place close to the hotel that was traditional Ukrainian cuisine, and decorated with taxidermy animals. Roman, Yana and our driver from Kiev were with us. We had lots of good food. Dinner, appetizers and vodka! I asked Yana "what do you have with your vodka" (meaning mixer), and she said slightly puzzled, cucumbers and pickles? We learned the rules of vodka, there must be a toast and everyone must have a shot! Needless to say, I had sips to everyone elses shots. I don't even remember what we had to eat, anything would have been tasted great. It was a wonderful day.
Coming up...Settling in for the long haul.

One Year Ago, Trip to Dneprodzerzhinsk

We were getting packed to leave Kiev at 2:00 am. We got no sleep at all, how do you sleep when your mind is racing and your nerves are on end. Would we know if she was the one for us? Would we be able to determine her delays considering the language barrier and her reported speech delay?
Yana, Roman and a driver were picking us up at 2:00am. How do you check out of the apartment at 2:00am?? At 1:55 the doorbell rang and there was the landlord for the money and the keys! Shortly after the van arrived for us and we were off. It was a large passenger van and Yana sat in front, Roman in the middle and Jon and I in the back seat. We all talked for a while then it was time to try to sleep. Yana was asleep right away and slept right through. Very soon we were in what looked like the middle of nowhere. It was all snow and ice and extremely bumpy. Where were the freeways?? I had a little pillow but when we went over bumps we flew off the seats and my pillow came out from under my head and Jon's head actually was hitting the ceiling. So much for sleep. We were passing what looked like farm land and many little tiny houses, for miles and miles. Many times the van would slide around on the road, while we alternated between slow and extremely fast driving. In the early morning hours when it was still dark there would be lone people walking down the road. The driver would slam on the breaks and jump out of the van and run over to these people. Was he asking for directions? Funny though, they never seemed scared or even surprised. If someone jumped out of a van in the dark and ran at me I would be terrified. We would often turn around after speaking to these people and go back the other way. Were we lost?? We seemed to be going in circles. Sometimes we would actually come to a dead end road and have to turn around. The driver spoke no English and Yana and Roman were sleeping, so we had no idea what was going on. Approximately 6 1/2 hours later we actually arrived in Dneprodzerzhinsk. It was about 9:00 in the morning and we first had to see the City Inspector to get permission to visit the orphanage. Yana had only been to this town once but she remembered how to get to the office. The Inspector was not there we would have to come back. We went to a little restaurant/bar to get some food and coffee. We were so stressed and overtired it was hard to enjoy it. We had these fried, cheese filled, dough things served with sour cream and marinara sauce. This little place was close to the orphanage so we actually ended eating here many times during our stay. This was the best place for coffee, the lattes were like home and always came with chocolate candy!
When we returned to the Inspector's office she was there. It was in an old run down looking building. When we went in she read over all our papers in great detail. She had orange hair and quite a lot of make up. She asked us many questions, including what classes our boys were taking in college! She was very stern and we really didn't care for her. At this time we thought this was just a formality, but we later learned she actually did have the power to prevent us from seeing children at the orphanage.
Yana told us the inspector would have to go with us to the orphanage. We were happy when her assistant decided to go instead. This lady was very nice, with a big smile and all gold teeth. (We would later learn this was quite common in Ukraine)
Up next......the first visit.

One Year Ago, the Mix-Up

One year ago in Kiev, the day after our SDA appointment. We were with Era taking care of some paperwork and going to a notary's office. The plan was to pick up our official referral paper from the SDA and take a van to Dneprodzerzhinsk at 2:00am for an overnight drive. We were excited, nervous, and full of hope. As we were walking around downtown Kiev with Era she began talking very fast and furiously on her cell phone, much more so than normal. I heard her day Di-ah-na, Di-ah-na, many times. I knew something was wrong. She was walking so fast we could barely keep up with her. Finally she stopped and was able to fill us in, bad news as I expected. The SDA had made a mistake and given DeAnna's file to someone else. How could this be?? We picked her first!! She was "ours"! I had a bad feeling yesterday when no one ever wrote anything down.

Era continued to make phone calls as she marched us back to the SDA. It must have been several miles and we didn't stop once, not even for cars or traffic signs. By the time we arrived she had straightened it all out and the ladies at the SDA remembered us and were nice and apologetic. Now we had paperwork in hand and were ready for the next journey.

One Year Ago, SDA Appointment

Unbelievable anxiety surrounded our appointment at the National Adoption Center. We were taken up to the "psychologist's" office and were not allowed to take anyone with us. Our facilitator told us to write down as much information as we could about the children we were interested in such as first and last name, location of orphanage , diagnosis etc. We were then to ask for 20 minutes to think about it, so she could use the information to try and find out as much information as possible before we made any decision. They were polite but not very friendly. They showed us a boy and girl sibling group and a nine year old girl. These were not right for us, and they proceeded to show us a many special needs children, and some with various severe delays. We picked out #1 (7 year old with "low IQ"), and #2 (4 year old with many delays) both girls appeared normal in their pictures. Then Jon pulled out a file and said what about this one? I was surprised he chose it because it was an infant picture of a baby with an unrepaired cleft lip. She was 4 and reported to have speech and psychological delay as well as a still unrepaired palate. We added her as #3 on our list. We asked for 20 minutes to think about our decision and they gave said we could have an hour and a half. We went downstairs and gave Era the information. She immediately started making phone calls and talking a hundred miles an hour in Ukrainian. She actually was using 3 cell phones. We went to a nearby cafe and watched in amazement as she performed many tasks simultaneously. She was able to locate the orphanages and talk to doctors and/or directors about all of the girls. #1 was said to be delayed enough to not even attend school. #2 and #3 were at the same orphanage and the orphanage doctor said she would definitely choose #3 because she was very pretty and very smart. This information was invaluable to us and we chose #3, Deanna. We went back and told them our choice. Era kept saying De-ah-na over and over again to this lady. I was a little worried about this procedure as no one wrote anything down, but all of their procedures seem odd and disorganized. We then left with some sort of relief but still a huge uncertainty of what we would find when we actually arrived at the orphanage. Remember, this would be the only chance we would have to meet a child. We just prayed our answer would be obvious to us.

One Year Ago Today, In Kiev

It was one year ago today that we left for Ukraine. Here are a couple of pictures from the apartment we stayed in. I remember every detail of this apartment very clearly. It was right in the center of Kiev, by Independence Square. It was old but very homey, warm, clean and felt safe. We were very stressed out at this time, overwhelmed with being in a foreign country and the huge uncertainty of what would happen with the adoption. It was in this apartment that we found out we would only receive one appointment at the SDA (instead of 2 or possibly 3 if necessary) to find a child. At the time couples were waiting at least 45 days for a second appointment and were being advised to just go home and wait. We knew due to expense and job obligations this would not be a possibility for us, so it was now or never, and we were at their mercy!
It was just past Christmas but the tree remained in Independence Square. We walked around this area at night and it was very beautiful. We were not brave enough to venture much further. It was easy to get turned around in the underground tunnels and reading street signs was impossible.

Speech Update

DeAnna recently had her follow-up appointment with the Speech Pathologist that specializes in cleft palate disorders. She thinks that DeAnna has made excellent progress in the last 5 months. Her palate is very functional which means no more surgeries, (on the palate that is).

I have been frustrated with the services provided by Early Childhood Intervention so I have been working with her every day at home for the last couple of months. We also found a private therapist who is very enthusiastic. She can repeat just about all words and is beginning to put together sentences of 3-5 words (and does this constantly!) She is sometimes hard to understand but getting better for sure.

Even with her limited vocabulary she can have a conversation with a complete stranger and have no trouble communicating. (Yes, we are working on stranger danger!)

All in all she has come a long way from completely nonverbal (and non-English) just last spring to understandable speech. This process has not been easy and she has and will continue to work very hard to develop the speech part of her brain. Clearly the social part of personality has overcompensated for this delay!

Happy New Year, 10 Months Home!

We had a fun filled New Years Eve at a party with our friends. There were lots of teenagers there so DeAnna was very excited, a little too much so! I forgot my camera so all I have is a picture of her morning bed head!
I am ready for the new year to get back a nice routine of school and activities.
DeAnna continues to do well and is very happy and healthy. We do have some appointments scheduled to plan her next surgery (lip scar revision) and future orthodontia work. She lost her first baby tooth on Christmas Eve!

Christmas Celebration.....Finally!

A few days after Christmas we had our celebration with Jon's family. Uncle Mike and Aunt Lori hosted the festivities. A good time was had by all and DeAnna really loved her gifts as evedenced by her famous thumbs up! There were also some fun dogs to play with!

The following pictures were taken by DeAnna, our budding photographer!

Jordan Saves Christmas

We had a nice Christmas Day celebration at our house this year. We anticipated everyone being able to make it to our house as all major roads were finally cleared. Our street however was still a couple feet deep in hard snow and ice. No regular cars could make it across the blockage created by the highway snow plows at the end of the street. Jordan's lifted jeep however could handle the terrain. He made many trips back and forth to the Safeway parking lot to deliver our family to the house. (Pictures courtesy of DeAnna)

DeAnna was very thrilled with her Santa gifts. She wanted a guitar and that was what she got. She also received a beautiful baby doll, a toy

camera, and lots of clothes.

Winter Storm Postpones Christmas Eve

Our back yard.

Our street.

Making a snowman before the big snowstorm.

This year we have been having a record breaking snow storm. While it may be fun for a short time, this region is not equipped to handle anything like this so getting around the metro area has been next to impossible. Fortunately I have had time off work so I have only had to trek across town and up "the hill" a couple of times. Jon of course must make it to work every day no matter what.

We have had no US mail, UPS, garbage service, or newspaper delivery for over a week!

Jeremy made it home before the second storm hit and his Mustang has been snowed in ever since.

The week before Christmas all parties and activities were cancelled, including the preschool Christmas program. Even our family Christmas Eve gathering was cancelled due to lingering poor road conditions.

We have had some nice family time at home though. The boys built a snowboarding jump in the field and DeAnna has enjoyed going outside with them.

We had a quiet Christmas Eve at home and opened presents from each other. DeAnna was of course thrilled with everything she received, and excited for "HO HO HO" to come.

Santa

DeAnna was able to visit Santa for the first time. She has been very excited about Santa, whom she refers to as "HO HO HO". We had practiced saying what she would like for Christmas (her main request is a guitar!) but when she finally got to see him she was too excited to ask for anything. However, in true DeAnna fashion, she charmed him out of his glasses in about a minute (see picture). The poor guy is lucky he didn't have a cell phone or a camera!

Winter Weather

We have been experiencing our first winter weather this year. Snow and very cold. We haven't had our winter clothes out since we returned from Ukraine in March. DeAnna was very excited to see the snow, but interestingly enough when I came downstairs wearing my Ukrainian fur hat she looked at me like I had lost my mind and said, "MAMAAAAA NO NO NO!!"

DeAnna has had lots of time to play at home because as is customary in our region, when there is snow there is no school (or daycare). Of course we still have work so Jordan has been kind enough to entertain his sister for us.

Christmas Tree

Today we went to find our Christmas Tree. DeAnna is very excited about seeing Christmas trees so we were anxious to get one. It was a georgeous day and we are lucky to have a fantastic tree farm about 1/2 mile from our house! DeAnna didn't care which tree we selected so I made sure we hiked around and saw every last one before making a final decision. The good ones are never close to the car!

9 Months Home

Nine months have passed already, I can hardly keep track. DeAnna is happy and energetic as usual!
We are continually working hard at her speaking skills. She can repeat almost all sounds and words now but has trouble putting them together in sentences. Her speech therapy through Early Childhood Intervention has proven to be disappointing. They only offer her one group session a week and I can not see any progress gained from there. Her private therapist is better, and offers some ideas, but I can get her to more for me working 1:1 at home.
However, this does not stop her from having conversations with complete strangers.
What she lacks in verbal skills she more than makes up for in drama. When shopping at the store she can often be seen practicing some dramatic performance, or character imitation. She's actually quite entertaining and requires no encouragement!

Thanksgiving

I guess everyone can guess what we're thankful for this year!

I had the pleasure of attending the preschool Thanksgiving program where all the kids wore costumes they made and sang songs. This was followed by a lovely "feast". I forgot my camera so I don't have pictures of the actual performance.

We had a nice quiet Thanksgiving with our family and Mimi and Grampa. Jeremy managed to come home for 2 days and we were glad to see him if only briefly. Deanna was glad to see him, but worried that he would eat her ice cream (i peam as she says). So we went out and bought him his own carton, she was very relieved. She's really not greedy he just teases her unmercifully about eating ALL the ice cream.

After Thanksgiving dinner we all went over to see Mimi and Grampa's new condo. It is vacant now and the boys hadn't seen it. It is close to downtown Portland and has spectacular views. Deanna was very excited and was sprinting up and down the hallway. She turned her head and ran right into a wall at full speed. She recovered quickly but is now sporting a black eye.

December is here and will be full of many "firsts" for our girl. Stay tuned for the highlights.

8 Months Home

We have been home 7 months now! Here is Deanna's preschool picture, I think it came out pretty nice. Here's a quick update:

She loves preschool and is eager to go every day. She verbal skills are coming along, but continue to require lots of reinforcement. I've found she gets lazy and she will use her "signs" or her own version of words that she can say correctly. At this point we discourage signs and make her repeat things. She is able to say "I want to watch a movie please" but usually says just 2 or 3 words together. She is an excellent communicator and can get her point across to anyone.

She thinks she owns all the ice cream in the house and goes into a little tirade if the boys eat any. She can really tell them off with her limited vocabulary!